Thinking about "someday"

Most of you know that I'm always on the internet reading news, entertainment and sometimes just random stories. So I started reading Kelly Crigger's blog a few months ago because he co-wrote one of my favorite books and we tweet every now and then and just because I really like how straight forward he is. I came across a post on his blog that I really enjoyed called: "Someday" and you can read it here: http://www.kellycrigger.com/someday/

This post got me thinking about "someday" and how my view of "someday" changed as I grew up. When I was a little girl I thought that "someday" I would be the first female South African fighter pilot. I grew up a few miles from an air force base and my mom is to this day in the South African Air Force. Other little girls wanted to be teachers or fairies but all I wanted to do was fly at the speed of light and do those fancy twists and turns and dog fights. Me in an F16 chasing a Grippen. Even today there isn't anything I love more than the sound of a jet, making your insides shake and your eardrums burst.

But then I grew up and reached the 6th grade. I still loved my jets and was still planning on becoming a fighter pilot but I discovered that singing also lit a fire in me and when I got to play the lead role in my school play in the 7th grade another fire lit up within me. I now also wanted to act. So I wanted to, "someday", be a singing/acting fighter pilot. That can be done, right?

In my junior year in high school that "someday" thing or place, fell apart. I couldn't do the math. I didn't understand the science. It's not that I am dumb, I just didn't understand.

So I had to re-evaluate my plans for "someday". I decided to focus all my attention on dancing, singing and acting. Words can not describe how proud I was to be awarded "Actress of the week" at a local play festival. I finished my senior year with high hopes for myself. I was just going to study drama and then walk into an agency be signed and go to America and make it.

The thing with "someday" is that it doesn't go according to our plan. I never said: "Someday I'm going to go to America and be an Au Pair for 2years." But "someday" decided that I would. It's like "someday" is an entity. It's like "someday" is a bully, carving desires into our hearts that we may never achieve.

I'm 21, I don't have it all figured out. I don't know what I'm going to do when I return to South Africa. Finish my degree, do my masters. Then what?

My "someday" plan is to travel A LOT and to entertain people. My "someday" plan is to own property on the beach in Clifton. My "someday" plan is to get married and love someone so much that I can't breathe without him. My "someday" plan is that "someday" exists.

I hope "someday" comes one day... Soon...